Tuesday, June 07, 2011

What Would You Change About Me?

I had a really cool conversation recently with my really cool wife that I want to share.

As we were laying next to each other she started the conversation with a simple, but knee-buckling question for any husband.  She asked, "If you could change one thing about me, what would you change?"  Thankfully she added a few qualifiers so I could stop sweating :) !  Then she reminded me of (and held me accountable to) a rule I have made for myself in 2011: I will share my feelings openly and honestly, in as loving way as possible, even if it causes me personal, emotional discomfort.

It took some courage but eventually I shared something with her that she had been doing that was kind of bugging me.  And here's the really cool part: she didn't freak out in anger, or try to justify herself, or crawl into a ball crying.  She said OK and we talked through.  I was able to understand her better and where she was coming from.  She was able to listen to my feedback and start thinking through adjustments that could be made.  Then we switched places and I asked her what she would like to change about me, and we worked through the whole process again.

And we GREW STRONGER as a couple through the whole experience.

I want to brag for one second.  Our marriage took a step forward that night because my awesome wife really wanted to know how she could make my life more pleasant and how she could grow as a person.  And she was willing to be vulnerable and humble enough to talk through it with punk like me!

How BRAVE and GODLY is that!
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