Blow it up, put it back together.
That's a phrase my wife Stephanie and I use to correspond with our celebration handshake. I know it annoys my neighbor which one reason we do it so much. However there is another, much more important reason - since we've started using this phrase we've come to realize it is actually a phrase that has a lot of meaning for us and the story of our life together.
We have gone through some pretty hard things during our 9 year run. Always the Lord has been faithful to meet our needs and sustain us through the darkest times. He is good.
I am usually the primary player in the 'blow it up' phase. I never have bad intentions, it is just that I have struggled for a long time acting like the rules that govern everyone else don't apply to me. I look for a way around the rule, or try to slide by on some technicality, foolishly thinking it will all work out in my favor.
I believe it is most often God's grace and not his wrath when hard times befall us. In his mercy God 'blows up' our lives in order that we might repent and turn to him. Trouble brings us to our knees and makes us refocus upwardly instead of inwardly. It is after things blow up, that they can then come back together.
Much needs to be said about the goodness of my wife in our marriage. More than once I have given her good reason to end our marital covenant, but by the strength of Jesus she has offered me forgiveness and the chance to rebuild trust and love. In Christ we have been able 'put it back together' - slowly.
I believe marriage is, by God's design, a picture of the relationship between Jesus Christ and his church. No matter how many times people sin and blow up their relationship with God, through the death and resurrection of Jesus, they are offered forgiveness and a chance to put the relationship back together.
I wouldn't have picked out the path I've walked, but I wouldn't trade it in for a different one either. I thank my wife, and I thank my Savior for the love and grace offered to me in my errors, and I am confident that the same love and grace is available to you as well, if you will confess your sin and repent of your wrong doing.