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15 Ways Parents Fail in Disciplining Their Children


I found this list on David Murray's blog.  I've really been wrestling with my behavior as a Father.  I love my kids passionately, and I want the very very best for them.  However, in my zeal, my selfishness gets in the way, and I tend towards anger and outburst far too frequently.

This list reminds me of the many ways that I can incorrectly discipline my children.

1. Excessive discipline: Too often or too hard.

2. Disproportionate discipline: Way out of scale to the offense.

3. Inconsistent discipline: Child punished for one offense one day but not on most other days.

4. Prejudiced discipline: Unfairly favoring one child over another.

5. Unexplained discipline: No explanation of why the child’s attitude, words, or actions were wrong, and therefore no understanding

6. Unforgiving discipline: Despite child saying sorry, the father keeps the child under a cloud for days/weeks after the discipline.

7. Imbalanced discipline: Discipline is never balanced with encouragement or praise for anything done right.

8. Humiliating discipline: Aims to belittle and shame.

9. Public discipline: No attempt to hide the child’s offenses and punishment from others.

10. Bad-tempered discipline: Terrifyingly out of control.

11. Prayerless discipline: No prayer before, during, or after the discipline.

12. Heartless discipline: No attempt to get behind the why of the wrong and show the child the need for heart-change.

13. Unwarned discipline: Child was never instructed about what was wrong or warned about the wrong before the discipline.

14. Selfish discipline: Parent takes out frustrations on child to make themselves feel better.

15. Gospel-less discipline: No hope of divine or parental forgiveness. Christ’s atoning sacrifice is ignored.

Thankfully I am not without hope.  I know that I am not ultimately responsible for what happens to my children.  They are God's children first and he alone is ultimately responsible.  I must simply strive to continue to learn and grow as a father, trusting that my Heavenly Father is with me and with my kids leading us to the place he wants us to be.
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